Tuesday, October 04, 2005

10-4 Groundhog

10-4 groundhog
I saw the ground hog this morning.
I was up by the cemetery field, looking down the rows of pumpkins when this varmint lifts up its head from between the rows up pumpkins. In fact it stood up on its hind legs.
With a piece of pumpkin, I swear, in its front paws (hands?)
And looked around as though it was scouting out a new country.
And when it saw me it stopped moving.
and stared.
A long stare,
But before I could move. Before I started running down the row in its direction it dropped back to the ground.
And took off.
Running, down the row ahead of me.
And just as we got to the fence (I couldn't have been more than a dozen paces behind)
It dove.
Under the electric fence.
Dove under the bottom strand of wire without touching.
And once on the other side it took off running. Down the tractor path.
At the fence I hesitated.
I couldn't climb under the fence like the varmint had done.
Instead, I carefully stepped back and then running, jumped.
A sort of high jump.
Over the top of the fence. Just clearing the top strand.
And there ahead of me was the varmint, still running, but it stopped. turned around. I swore it started at me, maybe even gave me a mocking grin.
And then disappearing,
Disappearing into a briar patch.
I kept on running, but I might as well have not.
Because, when we came to the briars, I had to stop.
Briars, for humans, are pretty much impassible.
But I did mark the place where the groundhog entered.
"I've got your number." I said to no one in particular.
And I've come back to the house.
I now know where that ground hogs home is.
I have several choices.
I can sit up the hill with a varmint gun and wait.
Wait for the pumpkin eating varmint to appear.
And bam. End of story.
Or, I can take on the the Great Pyrenees. Either Andorra or Twain, and I can put them inside the fence right about there.
Or, I have this large live trap. I can take it down to the place where the ground hog disappeared into the briars and I can bait it with bananas and onions and I can wait.
What do you think?


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